My niece Mallory Nicole Faith Sworaski was born late last night via c-section to my sister and her husband. She weighed in at 9lbs 1oz and 21 inches long. I was fortunate enough to be with my sister and her husband most of the day as a support person in the room while she went through labor. By the end of the night there had not been enough change and with the suspect of a big baby and Mallory's heart rate starting to dip here and there, they felt it was safer to do a c-section.
Things of course happened fast and my sister and her husband headed through the same doors Hugh and I had gone through only a little more than a year before ourselves. George was born at this same hospital by the same doctor who delivered Mallory. Many times as I took at trip to the room where they kept the ice my eyes glanced at those doors we had entered just a year before to bring George into the world and my eyes fell on the recovery room where I waited patiently to see my little boy and hold him for the first time. It was odd to be on the other end of it all and a spectator to such a miracle. Of course emotions ran high for me and have throughout my sisters whole pregnancy and mine.
The very thought that we would be back here in just a few short months became overwhelming to me. I was grateful to be able to walk the halls and have those memories one time before Gabrielle came so that the day she is born we are not taken back by the emotions for the first time. We know that the day she is born will be extremely emotional for us for so many reasons...I know there won't be a dry eye that day from either of us. This whole pregnancy has just flown by and I just pray that she has a long healthy life and that we never have to relive the nightmare of loosing another child. I know they will put her on a monitor and all of that but I'd be lying if I said I was not scared out of my mind. Seeing Mallory just reaffirmed my excitement and fear and all those crazy normal mixed up feelings. I can't wait to finally have her in our arms though. It will be so very bitter sweet. I thought about how I had hoped George would get to meet Mallory and be there to welcome her into the world...it was a sad realization that the dream of that was just that...a dream. The thought that he will be a big brother but never have met his younger siblings is just such a sad hard feeling to shake. Our reality is so very different than I had thought or had hoped for us all.
The boys are so excited and want to see her. Hugh told them this morning that Mallory was born and they wanted to see her. He showed her pictures to them and the ooh's and ahh's were non stop. All of them wanted to skip school and go see her! Of course there was no way we were opting for that. I also want to give my sister some time since I know how tough it is to have a c-section. With this being their first baby and they both have tons of friends and family, I also don't want to intrude or overwhelm them with tons of visitors especially since I know how crazy the boys can be. Hugh and I don't really get visitors like that but I know so many other couples like the two of them and it is non stop visits and it really becomes a lot to handle.
Until now, being pregnant has just not been real to me. I don't know if it is just because she is baby number 5 and each one seems to go so much faster. It seems so very surreal this time around. We have her room somewhat together but still have lots to get...maybe once we get some of that stuff it will seem more real but I have a feeling it won't be until she is here. Even then, I really think this is just going to be very different and more like being a first time parent all over again. I don't know why but only time will tell. For now we will enjoy being an aunt/uncle/cousins to Mallory. Please keep them in your prayers.
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