For Hugh

This is for Hugh who has walked this path of grief basically on his own being the stronghold for our family and trying to keep it together as our lives seemed to fall apart. He is a wonderful man, husband, and father.

Men Do Cry

by Ken Falk

I heard quite often "men don’t cry"
though no one ever told me why.
So when I fell and skinned a knee,
no one came by to comfort me.

And when some bully-boy at school
would pull a prank so mean and cruel,
I’d quickly learn to turn and quip,
"It doesn’t hurt," and bite my lip.

So as I grew to reasoned years,
I learned to stifle any tears.
Though "Be a big boy" it began,
quite soon I learned to "Be a man."

And I could play that stoic role
while storm and tempest wracked my
soul.
No pain or setback could there be
could wrest one single tear from me.
Then one long night I stood nearby
and helplessly watched my son die.
And quickly found, to my surprise,
that all that tearless talk was lies.

And still I cry, and have no shame.
I cannot play that "big boy" game.
And openly, without remorse,
I let my sorrow takes its course.

So those of you who can’t abide
a man you’ve seen who’s often cried,
reach out to him with all your heart
as one whose life’s been torn apart.

For men DO cry when they can see
their loss of immortality.
And tears will come in endless
streams
when mindless fate destroys their
dreams.

Poem

Author Unknown

O precious, tiny, sweet little one
You will always be to me
So perfect, pure, and innocent
Just as you were meant to be.

We dreamed of you and
of your life
And all that it would be.
We waited and longed
for you to come
And join our family.

We never had the chance to play
To laugh, to rock, to wiggle.
We long to hold you,
touch you now
And listen to you giggle.

I’ll always be your father,
She’ll always be your mom.
You will always be our child
The child we had.

But now you’re gone...
but yet you’re here.
We’ll sense you everywhere.
You are our sorrow and our joy.
There’s love in every tear.

Just know our love goes
deep and strong.
We’ll forget you never--
The child we had,
And will have forever.

Precious in God's Eyes

by Gail Fasolo

The lily only lasts a day
but God creates it anyway.
All that work to make a flower
then it’s gone, it had its hour.

Even though your baby died,
he is still precious in God’s eyes.
Your child came and made his mark
he changed your life and touched your heart.

Upon his death, to heaven he soared.
Here for a moment, now with the Lord.

Untitled Poem

It must be very difficult
To be a man in grief,
Since "men don't cry" and "men are strong"
No tears can bring relief.

It must be very difficult
To stand up to the test
And field the calls and visitors
So she can get some rest.

They always ask if she's all right
And what she's going through.
But seldom take his hand and ask,
"My friend, but how are you?"

He hears her crying in the night
And thinks his heart will break.
He dries her tears and comforts her,
but "stays strong" for her sake.

It must be very difficult
To start each day anew
And try to be so very brave--
He lost his baby too.

Author Unknown