New Year

This past year has put our family through hell and back over and over again. Our biggest blessing was Gabrielle and our greatest loss was George. I truly hope that 2011 holds much better things for us as we still face the possibility of foreclosure on our home and although Hugh has a job it still pays less than his unemployment did. All that said nothing compares to loosing a child so I guess even if we were to loose our home, nothing can be worse than the day George went to heaven.

I sat here yesterday with the reality of how fast life can change running through my mind. Last year we were so happy and excited for the life ahead of us. We were in Florida with my family and just enjoying ourselves and life to the fullest dispite the whole lack of job thing, that was peanuts to worry about and we knew that the time would come when Hugh would get a job. Little did we know as we watched our little boy(my mom and Hugh at least) roll over for the first time, it would be one of the last happy moments we had with him in it. My heart breaks just thinking of how that happiness and naive thought process is something that I will never have again. Although I knew he had a lot of medical problems, I kind of took him rolling over as my sense of security. I always held my breath until they rolled over since that was the one milestone that Josh had a hard time meeting. Once I saw George roll over I figured it was all ok...boy was I wrong. What I wouldn't give to go back to that day.

I can't do that unfortunately and have to now live this life that seems so strange to me. I am grateful for our blessings and I thank God for them every day. In the year to come I just hope that there are better things in store for us and that we can stop just having to survive obstacles placed in our path. Hugh and I have just been challenged time and time again and it just gets so exhausting. We hope that this year also holds positive moments for all of you and pray for you and your families as we ask you to do the same for us.