© Ferna Lary Mills
Grief, simply put, never ends. This is because we never stop loving the one who is
gone from us. But as we go on with living, grief eventually fades into the background
of our lives, only on occasion raising its ugly head. In the hustle and bustle of every
day life, sometimes we find ourselves moved beyond our grief and wrapped up in
just plain living. This is a good thing, for it gives us time and distance from our pain
as we continue to heal.
When my grandmother passed away it was not the first loss of a dear loved one that
I've had to endure, and probably not the last. But it was the most recent. However, I
discovered that not only did I have to face a new grief - this loss also reminded me
of my "old" grief. Suddenly, grief was no longer in the background of my life. It
seemed as if everything had returned with raw emotion, right back up to the surface.
Now, if you have ever read anything I've ever written here, you will know that I
cannot deal with these things. I simply don't have the strength. Fortunately, this is
okay. One of my favorite scriptures is Psalms 46:1 ~ "God is my strength and my
refuge. An ever present help in times of trouble."
During sorrow and strife, how many times have I cried out to God to "Give me
strength!" when in all actuality, that wasn't really what I needed Him to do. For even
God can't give this mortal body enough strength to endure some of the things life has
tossed at me. That doesn't mean He "can't" do it. It simply means He didn't create
THIS mortal body to handle that type of strength, because He has a better plan!
In times of trouble, when you feel like you can't go on, that your bones are tired, your
soul is weary and there's just no strength left in your spirit to persevere - ask God
for that strength. However, instead of asking Him to "GIVE me strength", pray that He
will BE your strength.
By asking God to BE your strength, you are no longer limited by your own resources.
He will be that supernatural strength that can only come from Him ~ from within!
This doesn't mean you're suddenly Superman and you can leap tall buildings. But
with His strength, you can put one foot in front of the other when all you want to do is
sleep. With His strength you can carry on with the things that you must do day to day
when all you want to do is bury your head in the sand. His strength gets you up and
moving when your strength cannot even stop the flow of one single tear.
During 10-months of one year, I lost both of my parents, went through a divorce,
battled my daughter's health and school problems, and watched my son's health
deteriorate due to what we believed was a terminal illness. Surely you don't believe I
came through all that on my own! No, I'm just not that good! But HE used His own
strength in place of mine to get me through all of that and more. Until you experience
it for yourself, it's almost impossible to comprehend.
The neatest thing is that all you have to do ... is ask. His strength, His peace, and
His comfort are just beyond your sight, yet given freely when you ask. I know this
because I have asked many times, and He has answered as many times. He
promises to be our "ever present help" in times of trouble.
I place one foot in front of the other, not on my own, but through Him. In the allegory,
"Footprints in the Sand", the author says God told the man He walked beside him in
life leaving two sets of footprints most of the time. When there was only one set of
footprints, that was the times that God was carrying him through his trials.
I prefer to believe that I always leave only one set of footprints, but that God is
walking in them with me. He can't get any closer to me than that.
May God bless you and comfort you and give you peace. ~Ferna
gone from us. But as we go on with living, grief eventually fades into the background
of our lives, only on occasion raising its ugly head. In the hustle and bustle of every
day life, sometimes we find ourselves moved beyond our grief and wrapped up in
just plain living. This is a good thing, for it gives us time and distance from our pain
as we continue to heal.
When my grandmother passed away it was not the first loss of a dear loved one that
I've had to endure, and probably not the last. But it was the most recent. However, I
discovered that not only did I have to face a new grief - this loss also reminded me
of my "old" grief. Suddenly, grief was no longer in the background of my life. It
seemed as if everything had returned with raw emotion, right back up to the surface.
Now, if you have ever read anything I've ever written here, you will know that I
cannot deal with these things. I simply don't have the strength. Fortunately, this is
okay. One of my favorite scriptures is Psalms 46:1 ~ "God is my strength and my
refuge. An ever present help in times of trouble."
During sorrow and strife, how many times have I cried out to God to "Give me
strength!" when in all actuality, that wasn't really what I needed Him to do. For even
God can't give this mortal body enough strength to endure some of the things life has
tossed at me. That doesn't mean He "can't" do it. It simply means He didn't create
THIS mortal body to handle that type of strength, because He has a better plan!
In times of trouble, when you feel like you can't go on, that your bones are tired, your
soul is weary and there's just no strength left in your spirit to persevere - ask God
for that strength. However, instead of asking Him to "GIVE me strength", pray that He
will BE your strength.
By asking God to BE your strength, you are no longer limited by your own resources.
He will be that supernatural strength that can only come from Him ~ from within!
This doesn't mean you're suddenly Superman and you can leap tall buildings. But
with His strength, you can put one foot in front of the other when all you want to do is
sleep. With His strength you can carry on with the things that you must do day to day
when all you want to do is bury your head in the sand. His strength gets you up and
moving when your strength cannot even stop the flow of one single tear.
During 10-months of one year, I lost both of my parents, went through a divorce,
battled my daughter's health and school problems, and watched my son's health
deteriorate due to what we believed was a terminal illness. Surely you don't believe I
came through all that on my own! No, I'm just not that good! But HE used His own
strength in place of mine to get me through all of that and more. Until you experience
it for yourself, it's almost impossible to comprehend.
The neatest thing is that all you have to do ... is ask. His strength, His peace, and
His comfort are just beyond your sight, yet given freely when you ask. I know this
because I have asked many times, and He has answered as many times. He
promises to be our "ever present help" in times of trouble.
I place one foot in front of the other, not on my own, but through Him. In the allegory,
"Footprints in the Sand", the author says God told the man He walked beside him in
life leaving two sets of footprints most of the time. When there was only one set of
footprints, that was the times that God was carrying him through his trials.
I prefer to believe that I always leave only one set of footprints, but that God is
walking in them with me. He can't get any closer to me than that.
May God bless you and comfort you and give you peace. ~Ferna
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